Why does good sex so often fade, even for couples that love each other as much as ever? What sustains desire, and why is it so difficult? In her witty and eloquent TEDTalk, Esther Perel argues that good and committed sex draws on two conflicting needs: our need for security, and our need for surprise. She explores the relationship between love and desire, and concludes that Love is generally an experience of HAVING, where as desire is generally an experiencing of WANTING. So the question becomes… How can we want what we already have? Watch this monumentally insightful video as Perel lets us in on the mystery of erotic intelligence.

The Secret to Desire in a Long-Term Relationship j

Written by Lifebook Member Margaret Stattman One of the key areas that has really changed for me is my character. I made a decision to step out of my comfort zone and be more courageous. I have a strong visual picture and feeling of how I would like to be, and I use this when making a lot of my daily decisions. Since doing Lifebook 6 months ago I have started sharing my ideas more freely. I have stopped thinking "I would like to do that one day" and started doing it now. For e.g. I've started doing swimming training with a local group, tried out Bikram Yoga for a month, suggested having a theme song in my work place to motivate and invigorate staff and customers, wrote an editorial for work place on a topic I had researched for my health and fitness chapter, decided to do a different family Christmas - instead of giving presents to each other we had an experience and went to the theater to see the musical "Mary Poppins." Areas I have seen definite changes in are:

Stress. It makes your heart pound, your breathing quicken and your forehead sweat. But while stress has been made into a public health enemy, new research suggests that stress may only be bad for you if you BELIEVE that to be the case. In the featured TED Talk below, psychologist Kelly McGonigal urges us to see stress as a positive, and introduces us to an unsung mechanism for stress reduction: reaching out to others.

Written by Lifebook Member Nicole R. I've always felt like there was a plan for me - I just never knew what that plan was - or never knew if that plan was big or small. Everyone has ups and downs in their life, and I thought I had experienced mine earlier then most, as I was in a car accident when I was 9 years old and was sitting next to my mother as she was taken from this earth far too soon at the age of 27. Being she was a single mom and I had never met my father, I went to live with my aunt and my brother went to live with his Dad. Throughout all of that my motto always was "everything happens for a reason." I didn't like my life. I wanted to be a typical child with 2 parents and siblings but clearly God had different plans for me. I always thought that by thinking everything happened for a reason, I was doing okay - I was going along with the life I was suppose to live. I was very good at going with the flow. Well little did I know how much I was missing out by living with this idea in my head. I was introduced to this little thing called Lifebook- you may have heard of it? ;-) - and literally a whole new world opened up for me. I realized that no matter what circumstances may have happened to me, I still could create the life I wanted to live.

There is a silent and growing epidemic of chronic dehydration in the world. So many suffer from it, yet are simply unaware of the symptoms. Are you one of them?

Here are 9 ways dehydration slowly wreaks havoc on your body:

Fatigue Water is the most vital source of energy in the body. Dehydration causes enzymatic activity in the body to slow down, resulting in tiredness and fatigue. Digestive Disorders A shortage of water and alkaline minerals, such as calcium and magnesium, can lead to a number of digestive disorders, including ulcers, gastritis and acid reflux. Constipation When short of water, the colon is one of the primary regions the body draws water from in order to provide fluids for other critical body functions. Without adequate water, wastes move through the large intestines much more slowly or sometimes not at all, resulting in constipation. Joint pain or stiffness All joints have cartilage padding, which is composed mainly of water. When the body is dehydrated, cartilage is weakened and joint repair is slow, resulting in pain and discomfort. Weight gain When dehydrated, cells are depleted of energy which causes them to signal our brain. As a result, people tend to eat more for energy, when in reality the body is thirsty. Skin disorders Dehydration impairs the elimination of toxins through the skin and makes it more vulnerable to all types of skin disorders, including dermatitis/eczema, psoriasis, as well as premature wrinkling and discoloration. Asthma and allergies When dehydrated, your body will restrict airways as a means to conserve water. In fact, the rate of histamine produced by the body increases exponentially as the body loses more and more water. High cholesterol When the body is dehydrated, it will produce more cholesterol to prevent water loss from the cells. Premature aging When chronically dehydrated, the body’s organs, including its largest organ – the skin – begin to wrinkle and wither prematurely.

The MOST BASIC thing you can do to IMPROVE YOUR HEALTH is to increase the amount of good quality water you consume everyday.

“The difference between successful people and HIGHLY successful people is that highly successful people say NO to almost everything.” -Warren Buffett Improving your life often means not adding to it, but taking away from it. As the Principle of Limited Focus taught us in Week 1 of VIP Bootcamp, being selective and doing LESS is the key to accomplishing MORE. What you DON’T DO is every bit as important as what you DO – maybe more important. Because every activity, every crisis, every opportunity competes for your limited time and your limited energy. What you choose to FOCUS your limited resources on will determine every outcome of your life. So, you not only need to guard your focus diligently, you need to create a mental and emotional fortress around it. Refuse to sacrifice the important to the unimportant. Define important things in your life and keep everything else out! Literally, determine what you're NOT going to focus on and block those things out of your life! Only be saying NO to almost everything are we able to say YES to the right things. And if we want to be 12-category smart, we should be running our entire lives according to this principle. But this can be a very challenging thing to do, because most of us are addicted to saying YES. Whether we want to help people, we’re afraid of being rude, or we feel we’ll miss out on the opportunity being presented, there always seems to be a reason to say yes. It takes DISCIPLINE to say no. And it takes practice. But it really doesn’t have to be so complicated!

Written by Dixie R. When I initially arrived at the Lifebook Lounge, I was a bit skeptical about what I was going to experience. I knew it was sure to be a great program but I figured it would be a similar to programs I had already seen. I was open minded and excited to see what it was about. As we started doing the activities it became apparent to me that this was different. It really started digging deep to the root of every category. As we moved along, it forced me to look within myself and access deep feelings and emotions I didn't even realize I was harboring. I learned a lot about myself. At one point I wanted to quit because it was very difficult to face the emotions the categories were stirring up. I saw it through and by the time we were done I felt empowered to overcome the obstacles that I was allowing to get in my way and move toward my life vision.

What you appreciate appreciates. It increases in value. Gratitude is a powerful thing, which has us asking ourselves -- How can we truly, deeply feel more of it? When it comes to generating those big, awe-inspiring, soul-penetrating feelings of gratitude, ACTION IS KEY. Mere lip service to gratitude is meaningless. You express and experience true gratitude by HOW YOU INTERACT with the things in your world, and by WHERE YOU CHOOSE TO PLACE YOUR FOCUS. In every passing moment you have a very conscious choice - - you can focus on what is abundant in your life, or you can focus on what is lacking.  There is never a shortage of either, and whichever you favor will expand before your eyes. What you choose to put your attention on enlarges, and tightens its grip on your world. The simple but powerful act of really seeing and appreciating what’s in front of you expands your freedom, creativity, and peaceful contentedness with your life, just as it is.  This is the true essence of joy. Gratitude is the beating heart of happiness and sufficiency. But sometimes feeling truly “grateful” is easier said than done, right? Gratitude requires presence and patience, and in the don’t-stop-until-you-drop daily grind of modern society, that can be hard to tap into. But never fear. We’ve identified 6 everyday ways you can turn gratitude into an ACTION WORD.

Written by Amber Salisbury; Love Coach, Lifebook Member, and Lifebook Leader. For more information, email Amber at amber@amberthelovecoach.com or visit her website at amberthelovecoach.com. My husband Andrew and I have a New Year’s Eve tradition.   Every year we spend the last hour of the year recounting the highlights and magic moments of the year that is passing.   Then we spend the first hour of the New Year imagining and envisioning what we will create in the year to come. One particular year had been a tough one.  Andrew’s business, which was all outside of the U.S., was forcing him to travel far more than ever before.  We were apart more than we were together.  I had a miscarriage and had also lost my beloved father to Alzheimer’s.  Somewhere during all of these external pressures and heartbreaks we lost a bit of our connection, not to mention the passion that had been present in the early years of our marriage. The last hour of that New Year’s Eve was rough.  We were struggling to come up with magic moments in the category of Love.  Part of it was a proximity problem.  It helps in the passion category if you are actually in the same city.  But more than proximity we realized that we had been in survival mode.  We had spent that year just trying to survive it. We decided in that moment that we would make our Love Relationship our #1 focus.  

Sacrifice now to enjoy later! On December 4th I walked / hobbled into the Lifebook Lounge with my wife Beverly. At the time, I was not able to walk due to re-injuring a disc in my spine. We laid out goals for EVERY area of our life. For myself, the most important was my health! If you don't have that, nothing else works! I meticulously wrote out my plan with exactly what I needed to do and who I needed to help me. I also did this for the other areas of my life. However, to be honest I had no idea how the other goals would be achieved because I was in so much pain I could not think or function. As soon as the plan was complete I went to WORK. The plan has NOT been easy in the least. It has required hard work and lots of sacrifice. Included in my plan was to lose 27lbs by March 1st and have my spine functioning back to normal by that time as well. My sacrifices have included not eating foods I love, saying no to things I love and spending time away from people I love. The result has been:
  • I have lost 26lbs (1 more to go)
  • I am completely pain free (12mm disc herniation down to 1.5mm)
  • I am more in love with my wife and family than ever before
  • Every one of the goals I set for ALL of 2015 have been hit except for 1 which will be hit by March 1st.
  • I have opened 2 customized nutrition offices with others set to open April 1st, June 1st and August 1st
  • Opened another Chiropractic office with 2 others set to open by the end of the year
  • Had the highest collections month in 2 years in my personal Chiropractic office
  • Had the best month in a company I co-founded that opens up Chiropractic offices!!